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I think we can all agree that at some point in time we have been mistreated by a family member, friend, relationship or co-worker. I can name at least three different situations in the past 6 months where I have struggled to let a certain grudge go. I tend to be a people pleaser. I love to make sure that every person in my life is happy. For example, it could be something as small as letting a friend wear a dress I wanted to wear or something as big as canceling a vacation so I could be at a friend’s charity event.  I literally pour my heart and soul into the people I care about, but as I have grown older I have realized people do not always reciprocate the feeling.
Recently, I had to distance myself from a certain situation that almost broke me. I became so down because I took the situation too personally. I am sure you may be thinking of a time you have felt the same or maybe going through a similar emotion right now. I encourage you to do some reflection on the situation. What does this person add to your life? Do they give to you on a regular basis, or it is a one-way relationship? If this person is normally a positive influence in your life; you should consider trying to meet with them and tell them how you feel, in person. YES, I did say in person, like an actual face to face coffee date. Not a text or call, a true meeting of minds in a neutral place. I believe communication is key, and when someone mistreats you, it is best to let that them know how you feel and why it hurt you. On the flip side, if this person does not bring out good in you, does not add value to your relationship, or is just straight-up bad; you should consider distancing yourself from them.
Recently, I had to “let go” of several relationships that no longer served a positive place in my life. Instead of copying the behavior of the person that hurt you, consider rising above the situation and never lose sight of your higher self. I taught myself that surviving these times in life is all about the reaction in any given situation. As humans, it is easier for us to act brittle and mean when you feel mistreated. Show the people that have wronged you love, and it will help impact their human spirits a lot more than a rebuttal in the heat of the moment. Choose to react in a nice manner or choose to do something that shows kindness and consideration. Your choice will send a powerful message. When someone mistreats you, and you respond with kindness, it can be refreshing because most people expect you to treat them the same. Often, nice deeds translate to a secret message that says something mind changing to the other person. Being nice to someone that hurt you, says to that person, “you matter.” When we choose the road of kindness, it also says a lot about our values and what kind of person we are deep inside. Even better than changing our own selves, our nice attitudes can dramatically influence people when we show them how to love.
I certainly know how it feels to be let down by someone. But I know that with pain comes understanding, with understanding comes commitment to know that with the right attitude, walls can be knocked down, hearts can change, and, with the right leadership, a friendlier environment can be born. Don’t let yourself be hurt from others. Rise above your pain and own your power, and most importantly, be KIND!